CindyWitt's Blog

Say it to Yourself!

February 9, 2010 · Leave a Comment

It’s very good to keep certain things to yourself…and one of them is your self-talk.  It is only for you, for it is how you speak about yourself to yourself.  This very powerful language is a persons greatest ally.  By training your brain and tongue to speak with positivism, and full of goodwill, your intentions will become driving forces of success and joy.  There are many ways to tell a story, and the best ones are delivered with word pictures.  This is true of our inner language.  The best way to use our internal dialogue is to line up the speech with our thoughts and intentions.  If you identify something good you would like for yourself, then speak well about it to yourself.  For example, you wish to have a beautiful hair style and yet you constantly tell yourself how horrid your hair is.  That doesn’t line up with your wish.  So, you begin to say, even if it’s not yet true, my hair looks and feels so beautiful.  Then, you’ll begin to notice how you change your behavior.  Maybe you spend a little more time on styling it, or try a new cut, or learn a technique to make it look pleasing to you.  This all happens because of your change in self-talk.  Take that to matters of real significance…and you’ll find lots of changes happening in whatever venues you want.  Your finances can turn for the better as you begin to tell yourself so.  Maybe a new job will become available, or a second source of income becomes an opportunity.  If you’ve wanted to spend more time walking, but keep telling yourself you’re too busy, you’ll never get to it.  On the other hand, when you begin to say, “I may have 10 minutes before my shower this morning,” you’ll notice how much easier it is to get your legs out the door.  By affirming how healthy you look and feel, may help bring healing with whatever you are already doing.  Having an attitude of “I’m attractive, and I’ve got many men calling for dates,” might be the change you need to help you be aware of the things that need attention to help you be attractive.  Whatever you desire…set your inner dialogue in sync with that…and your outer behavior will begin to shape up.  Say it to yourself…and say it so you mean it!

→ Leave a CommentCategories: Communicating Effectively · Self Talk for Success · The Power of Words · words are powerful
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Start Right Where You Are!!

February 8, 2010 · Leave a Comment

What do you have to work with today to get to where you want to be tomorrow?  Are you waiting for the next promotion or to land a job in another field?  It can become an excuse to drop the ball in your current opportunity.  If you give your best attention and most excellent effort now, today…you will surely make strides toward whatever your goals are.  Plan for tomorrow, but apply the steam today…and see what will come of it.  Just look at your current job as a training ground for the skills required in the position you are wishing for.  Remember it’s the accumulation of many small things that builds the confidence to win the prize we’ve got our eye on.  The good news is, it’s not necessary to plan out today in total detail, but decide to get the most important things done…without getting side-tracked in the tyranny of the urgent.  Consider this…if you made headway 5 out of 7 days…you’ve done well.  If you make progress 3 of 4 weeks in a month…you’ve done well.  If you show progress 9 of 12 months…you might not think so…but you’ve done well.  Keeping the feeling of making progress alive…as it is vital to help you get to the place you ultimately wish.  Maybe you don’t like starting  right where you are…but it would be wise to use it as a platform to get to the place you’ve envisioned!!

→ Leave a CommentCategories: A Viewpoint for Life · Adjusting Attitudes · All Things Are Possible · Attitude Creates Success
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10 Attributes of Leadership!!

February 7, 2010 · Leave a Comment

 

It’s no secret that people who have reached great success in their endeavors, do so because of the convictions they believe in and attributes they exercise.  They don’t live by the philosophy, ”Do as I say, not as I do.”   They live to feel the results from their good leadership…respect, power, and profitability.  And, when it’s all said and done…they’ve enjoyed the ride because it’s been done with a clean conscience, worthy aspirations, and excellent work ethic.  See how many of these qualities you embody and where you could use a little boost!   These 10 attributes are just the beginning of great leadership!!

  • courageous, seeks support 
  • self-control, disciplined
  • fair in dealings, understanding
  • strategizer, consults team for ideas
  • decision maker, assumes full responsibility
  • servant-leader, has hands in the work
  • attention to detail
  • proven excellence
  • generous
  • respects God

→ Leave a CommentCategories: A Viewpoint for Life · Attitude Creates Success · Leadership Attributes
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It Used to Be Positive!!

February 6, 2010 · Leave a Comment

Somewhere along the way…the company’s leadership slipped a little.  The product is still the same, and the methods they use to sell the product are still the same.  But, the persuasion…the attitude has shifted ever so slightly over the last 12 months to a place they might not realize they are in.  From an upbeat mode of operende…to the now desperate and clamoring kind of message coming across in their pitch…it is a huge turnoff to buyers.  Maybe they don’t realize the change has caused many customers to leave their website…and purchase a similar product from a competitor.  Guaranteed this will cost them greatly…and could cause the company to crumble.  No one wants to be a part of a sinking ship.  No one wants to be guilt-driven, or panic-driven into a product.  No one wants to feel bad when they open their wallet…even if it’s for something they need.  This famous company needs to get a hold of their original vision and get their attitude on the right side of the stick.  They’ve got to remember how and why people buy things…and when, which is when they feel good.  It will be interesting to see how this company fares over the next 12 months.  No good organization can thrive under the leadership that espouses negative, fear-based campaigns.  It used to be positive…and it can be again!!

→ Leave a CommentCategories: A Viewpoint for Life · Communicating Effectively · Positive Energy Sources
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You Hold the Keys!!

February 5, 2010 · 1 Comment

For whatever you dream of…whatever you can imagine…you hold the keys to its reality.  Your thoughts don’t betray you…they confirm what it is you are supposed to be doing.  Listen well.  No one but you can know what your passions are…so who do you think has the privilege of choosing what to do with them?  What if you never acted upon the true heartbeat of your life?  It is a tragedy for you…and for all of us…as we miss being blessed by your giftedness…let alone you missing out on the great and deep fulfillment of exercising your passion.  You’ll never look at art or listen to music the same…as you think about how they took the first frightening step toward making their dream a reality.  Consider the dwelling you live in…someone dreamed about it before it became a living place that you now occupy.  The car you drive, the clothes you wear, the perfume and makeup you lavish on your body…they were all imagined before created.  What do you wish to do or be?  It may not be far off from where or what you are now.  Should you find yourself having actualized many of your dreams already…what else would you like to experience or create in the next year or two?  Dream long and dream big…only you hold the keys to make it happen!!

→ 1 CommentCategories: A Viewpoint for Life · All Things Are Possible · Attitude Creates Success
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The Secret to Feeling Successful!!

February 4, 2010 · Leave a Comment

How do we become good at anything?  Practice, practice, practice…just as we’ve been taught!  Feeling successful can come before the success actually arrives…and the secret to doing so is very simple.  Be successful at something.  Something small preferably, which works best for those of us who feel overwhelmed and not so confident at the moment.  Success begets success…and the contagious nature of duplication might be found in any realm you choose.  For example…you may be the best omelette maker in the world…or at least in your world.  Keep doing that…and do that a lot!  Then, move to the toast arena and develop the “half way through toasting, turn the slice of bread trick” for perfectly toasted bread.  Is your orange juice usually from a can or jug?  How about investing in a plastic citrus squeezer (that you twist an orange or grapefruit on in about 8 seconds)…and serve yourself  fresh squeezed orange juice to top off the breakfast?  By mastering each step in the production of preparing breakfast…you will feel very successful.  Now, imagine applying this secret of contagious success to other slightly more significant aspects of your life…and you’ve got the recipe for feeling successful, even before the grand finale arrives!!

→ Leave a CommentCategories: A Viewpoint for Life · All Things Are Possible · Attitude Creates Success · Given to Excellence · Positive Energy Sources
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Asking the Big Questions!!

February 3, 2010 · Leave a Comment

When the question runs through your mind…you’re quite horrified that you’re capable of such boldness, and terrified that you might find an answer that betrays your traditional view.  Evaluating whether you should entertain the thought makes you feel as though you’re treading somewhere without permission.  Metaphorically looking around…you don’t think anyone will notice…so you go ahead and ask.  Does God really exist?  Am I the only real human on the face of the earth…who is just a part of a supernatural experiment?  Is there life after death?  Is my perception of reality anyone else’s?  Is there only one way to heaven?  There’s a million other interesting philosophical topics…that may not have satisfying answers or explanations for us.  But, that is the beauty of the uniqueness we all inherently have.  No topic will be the viewed the same or satisfied the same for all of us…which creates freedom and space to choose what we allow to impress our life.  We perceive and define truth, universal laws, God, our connection to God, and ourself, differently throughout our life as part of the naturally evolving cycle of curiosity, discovery, and satisfaction in asking our biggest questions!!

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Eye Therapy!!

February 2, 2010 · Leave a Comment

Darker days of winter and colder air brings a glum spirit around that isn’t welcome for long.  Wishing for the long sunlit days of August and warm summer afternoons on the beach…6 months seems like a long time to wait.  A switch flipped when my eyes landed on an entirely yellow page of summer clothing…obviously being advertised way ahead of the season to get the juices flowing…and the mood lightened.  There was a pair of bright yellow skinny jeans, a creamy yellow polka dot bikini, really cute yellow sandals with wood high heels, a yellow, white, and black silky scarf…perfect for wrapping around your hair for a ride in a convertible, a yellow bandeaux-style beach cover-up, and a darling yellow flower sundress, accessorized with a funky yellow glass beaded necklace.  The splash of sunshine shot right through my eyes into my spirit and elevated it right out of winter.  This little page cut from the travel magazine will be kept right at my desk for the next several weeks for eye therapy!!

→ Leave a CommentCategories: Investing in Yourself · Positive Energy Sources · Positive Energy for Women
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Unexpected Gifts!!

February 1, 2010 · Leave a Comment

The alarm rings an hour earlier than its suppose to, a lonely coyote howls in the pre-dawn hours for a mate to join him…and all of a sudden, you’re up for the day.  Wandering into the museum-quiet kitchen to heat water for tea, you wonder what you’ll do with the extra hour that just showed up.  Turning on your computer, you notice light emerging faintly above the top of the hills behind the house through your back window.  The dawn spreads out in a matter of minutes, delicately unfolding its intense watercolor palette.  Somehow, you’re drawn into the beauty of the moment and wish to be in the middle of it.  Standing on the ledge of the garden wall, you draw in the effusive shades of pink, tangerine and pale blue.  Feeling silly if anyone saw you…you shrug off the notion that they’ll think you’re nuts…and you stretch your arms out to embrace the sun as it rises up over the curve of the hilltop.  And there…you found you were a part of this daybreak…mixed in with natures finest elements.  Just as quickly and quietly as it came…the dawn’s kiss is gone and you relish in the afterglow of the unexpected gift.  Now, your day starts, but with a different viewpoint as you get back to the routine!!

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The Light Goes On!!

January 31, 2010 · Leave a Comment

How insanely wonderful it is when the motley teenage son announces he’s going to step away from the Xbox game that has been so addictive and acknowledged that it had contributed to lowering his grades.  After threats, punishments, phones taken away, and privileges lost of playing this game at friend’s houses…it seemed that nothing would get to the man-child who was consumed with bettering his score on some stupid game possessing the entire junior high school.  His normal report card would show all A’s and B’s…as he was always a good student.   But…it seemed the entire youth population was riveted to certain DVD games and some of these kids were even internationally rated with their superior scores.    It’s crazy to think we used to play such conventional games like hide-and-seek until the street lights came on, which was the signal to run home for dinner.  We built forts, played kick ball, tennis, and basketball right in our own neighborhood.  We helped with the yard work and washed our cars on the weekends.  Telephones were used to set times and places to meet friends…or for an emergency call home to our folks.  Music was enjoyed mostly in the car, or if we were lucky, on our own AM/FM radio in our room.    Now, there is texting, instant messaging, and twitter to keep umbilical cords in place with every relationship we’ve ever made in our life.  Using Playstation, Wi, and Xbox, and I-Pods, are as normal as taking a Flintstone vitamin…a daily habit!   So, as the unheard of, and totally unexpected pleasure happened tonight… the soon-to-be driving son…proclaimed he’s walking away from the detrimental distraction so he can focus on getting his grades up.  Wow, what a glimpse into his constitution…and an affirmation that he’s got his bearings straight.  When the light goes on…you know the guy is going to do just fine in the big wide world!!

→ Leave a CommentCategories: Overcoming Obstacles Successfully · Parenting Teens · Uncategorized
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Where Will You Be??

January 30, 2010 · Leave a Comment

Sometimes an idea strikes you bluntly…and sometimes it takes a while to sink in.  The dealing process…or grieving process…is the series of passages ways we go through in absorbing and adjusting to life’s changes.  Even as we are very familiar with the psychology of coming to terms with impacting issues, we still struggle to plunk ourself down in one particular catagory…shock, denial, anger, acceptance, healing…for we wish to zip through the row and be done with it already.  To think we are only in the tail end of shock, for instance…and have the rest of the stages ahead of us…can add pain to the pain.  Wouldn’t it be nice to be knocked out for the duration and be aroused when we’ve finally reached the healing part?  Or is it really as tidy as all that?  Do we actually cycle through the process and back again as we change…and we’ll find ourself revisiting the issue several times, over the course of our life.   We’d all like to side-step loss or defeat, but that wouldn’t be human.  The “dealing process” is intertwined with acceptance and resistance to change, and the better change agents we are…the better time we have of making progress through the cycle.  Where will you be when you realize everything has changed…and you are okay…different…but, okay??

→ Leave a CommentCategories: A Viewpoint for Life · Adjusting Attitudes · Attitude Creates Success
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A Timeless Dream!!

January 28, 2010 · Leave a Comment

Donna Lewis’s song, Love You Always Forever, has super great lyrics that take you back to those perfect moments shared with someone you’ve loved.  “Warm rains… windless summer nights…secret moments shared…soft words spoken.”    The soft drum beat lulls you into another world; another time.  “You’ve got…the most unbelievable blue eyes…you’ve got me almost melting away.”   Here the swooning is almost too much as you recall the sacredness of those private, sweet moments.   “I love you always forever. …near or far, closer together…everywhere I will be with you…everything I will do for you.”   Pledges of eternal love, an orchestra bringing a romance novel to life, and the emotions connecting us on every level.   We’re all there, at some time, some place…somehow.  We get to live our timeless dreams over and over, in the gift of this beautiful song!!

→ Leave a CommentCategories: Investing in Relationships · Romantic Love · Your Passion
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More Than That!!

January 27, 2010 · Leave a Comment

You have an idea of what you’d like or need…and you’ve got it pictured in your mind.  You ask for it to come to pass…with God’s help, and begin working toward the goal.   Then, in the great process of having it fulfilled…you often find the results are far better than you’ve imagined.   In addition, the answer usually includes other requests being granted collectively.   That is the mind-blowing part…because there is no way you could have orchestrated the networking of how your goals are met.  You may just happen to pull into your neighborhood with perfect timing to connect with a friend who ends up having a piece of the puzzle for your goals…unbenounced to them.  Or, you may find yourself in a gym class with your soon to meet life mate.    Getting out for an errand may end up creating a new business client bringing you closer to your financial goals.   Striking up conversation or a reading a magazine article in a waiting room may produce a link to vital information you’ve sought.   Your new home might be situated in a community of people with whom you will mutually share valuable advice during the years to come.  The club you joined will create more opportunity for your growth and social pleasure than you’ve hoped for.  How amazing it is to find that the road to your goal(s) is multifaceted in purposes that are way beyond your imagination and always give you more than you’ve expected!!

→ Leave a CommentCategories: A Viewpoint for Life · Connecting to the Source · Positive Energy Sources · Road Map for Fulfillment · Women Reaching Goals
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Before Your Feet Hit the Floor!!

January 26, 2010 · Leave a Comment

As the alarm goes off and you contemplate your move from the bed to the bathroom…give yourself the first gift of the day.  Picture one thing you would like to do today in as much detail as your foggy head can imagine.  Will you be traveling somewhere, visiting someone, doing errands, tackling a business assignment, or cleaning your house?  Are you going to prepare for the day’s event(s) by treating yourself to a healthy breakfast, leaving plenty of time to arrive on time, and showing up with a good attitude?  How we predispose ourself before the morning begins sets the tone for the entire day, and helps us have a better attitude with challenges that may arise.  Keep picture yourself in positions of gracefully accomplishing the goals throughout the day…and you’ll find the benefit in the gift you gave yourself before your feet even hit the floor.

→ Leave a CommentCategories: A Viewpoint for Life · Attitude Creates Success · Overcoming Obstacles Successfully · Positive Energy Sources · Seeking Success
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The Evolution of Midlife Crisis!!

January 25, 2010 · Leave a Comment

The car is a dead give away.  Schlepping our kids and their friends, sporting equipment, groceries from Costco runs, shedding dogs, and sandy boogie boards, has come to an end and we’re still driving the utility car.  On the road, we  find ourself longing for that sleek sedan, cost saving hybrid, or sporty convertible made for two.  100,000 miles have ticked by on the odometer, our seat edges are fraying, and the car has a unique mix of fragrances, created over the years, consisting of gym bag aroma, fast food oil, and old air breathed in and out by several bodies commuting together each day.  The midlife crisis is in full swing and we want to ditch everything that makes us feel tied down or “not fun.”  Our attitude has shifted to, “Now it’s my time!”  But…we really have no clue what that means…or how it plays out.  The quantum leap from raising kids to the empty nest syndrome leaves most of us spinning and confused.  We run to other relationships, new careers, take up with “hipper” friends, or majorly change our style of clothing and hair.  We might have a bit of plastic surgery or a hair replacement procedure, and lots of connecting on Facebook or Classmate websites.  Our instinct is to stop the clock and go back to a time in life when we felt vibrant and footloose.  It was fun back then, for sure.  Not only is it impossible to recreate and sustain that younger phase of  life…but, we’ll find the price we have to pay is so high for the things we’d sacrifice if we jump ship rather than evolve through the passage way to the next normal phase of life.  We’ll all come to face to face with the brutal fact that…we are different now.  Those of us who make this transition without damaging ourselves too much, are grateful to have this new time to get to know our spouse all over again, go back to school and develop our skills or advancement possibilities, or now have time to enjoy the interests that we previously weren’t able to.  All this is do-able without snapping everything familiar to us if we’re just patient with ourselves.  Our attitude toward evolving through midlife isn’t easy or fun exactly…but we will evolve one way or another…it’s just a matter of choosing the style we’ll do it with.  No amount of planning or understanding can ever prepare us for our next major life change…but, if we are true to our core values, set some goals and put fear aside…we have the best chance at enhancing all the things in our life we’ve already invested in.  Go with it…swim in the wave of change…and even if something is lost or damaged in the evolution of our midlife crisis…we’ll salvage what we can and ultimately reinvent that part of our life!!

→ Leave a CommentCategories: A Viewpoint for Life · Attitude Creates Success · Perserverance for Women
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Looking Through the Glass!!

January 24, 2010 · Leave a Comment

Love has the uncanny ability to show the truth…truth about who you really are verses who you portray yourself to be.  Being honest with yourself to see through your facades, as if just a piece of glass separated you from your inner truth, is the best gift you can ever give to yourself.  If you live your life from your “wished-for perception”…you may find yourself perpetually living in a gray zone, and ultimately unfulfilled.  If you’ve been brave enough, and love yourself enough, to do some soul-searching and embrace the true you…at that point, all of life is available for you to pursue with wholehearted effort and enjoyment.  Those people who choose to deceive themselves thinking they are something or want something that is not congruent with who they really are…bring misery to their most significant relationships…and eventually lose them.  How sad to live with the wool pulled over your own eyes, binding yourself from actualizing the best life has for you…because you’ve convinced yourself you are something you’re not.  The gray zone is full of silent suffering and the ambiguity breeds dysfunction.  Somehow, we need to find the safe zone…to sit with ourself, undistracted, and really see through the unobstructed glass to who we are at our core.  Only then, will we step into the light needed for us to find happiness with ourself and be able to act in a healthy way in our most special relationships.  Being brave may take a few tries before we get to the place where we look fully through the glass…but keep at it…you’ll be so relieved when you finally do!!

→ Leave a CommentCategories: Adjusting Attitudes · Investing in Yourself
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You’re There For a Reason!!

January 23, 2010 · Leave a Comment

Pony-tails were flying as the cheerleaders yelled and clapped during their routine.  Silently, the tallest girl slipped to her side and lay on the ground trembling.  The other girls froze…not knowing what was going on.  A mom who was standing at the end of the bleachers made her way to the 14-year-old at the same time another mom reached the girl.  Incoherent, she was still seizing in the aftermath of the first episode.  Her head was quickly cradled under a sweatshirt as someone yelled to call the paramedics.   Her parents were obviously not in the crowd, so the other moms huddled around her, taking her pulse and trying to communicate with her.  The entire gym waited for help to arrive, not understanding the cause of her condition.   How odd to think that we all may find ourself like that little girl…in some critical moment of our life, with only strangers around to help, (as the chances of encountering an emergency with a family member present, is slim.)  This teenager had no clue she was surrounded so quickly by 2 nurses, a woman familiar with her own seizures, and a mom who had a daughter with a seizure disorder… all who instantly appeared from the crowd.  Isn’t that a little too coincidental…to just randomly show up?   I don’t think so.  Know ahead of time, how much you’re appreciated when you find yourself coming to the aid of a stranger.  You were hand-picked to lend help or healing  in someone else’s trauma, at that exact moment…for a reason!!

→ Leave a CommentCategories: A Viewpoint for Life · Helping Others
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Wow-ing Youself!!

January 22, 2010 · Leave a Comment

You feel like pinching yourself when those woo-hoo moments arrive.  You can’t believe you’ve reached the finish line.  With the pain and challenges behind you, it feels tremendous to have the view from the top of the mountain.  The moments when you felt suspended off the side of the cliff, or were so frustrated you wanted to pack it in, and the energy and  resources ran thin…you somehow made it!  Your steadfastness paid off.  Even the nay-sayers are now impressed and encouraged to add a little extra oomph into their effort.  Some said you might fail, or regret your investment.  And maybe you might not have done so well, if you listened to them.  But, you didn’t.  You ran the race and it was hard.  The crowd you started with in attempting the mountain top may have thinned out as they met with obstacles, and you kept at it.  You found a way to deal with the problems…and kept pressing forward.  Maybe you ate humble pie a few times, as your plans had to change a bit, or you didn’t do part of  the journey very well at all.  So what!  Now you’re here…celebrating the great victory.  You find such an enhanced life, now that you’ve traveled the road to your goal.  It’s great fun wow-ing yourself in the pursuit of accomplishment!!

→ Leave a CommentCategories: All Things Are Possible · Attitude Creates Success · Just Do It! · Overcoming Obstacles Successfully · Tools for Motivation
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Both Ends of the Stick!!

January 21, 2010 · Leave a Comment

We’re told to fasten our thoughts on only what we want in life…but to know what we want, or like, is to also know what we don’t want, or like.  The stick has two ends.  Holding it in the middle creates two sides…which allows a good mental picture for categorizing and evaluating our desires.  Two sides of a coin…two choices of chaise lounges, two parts of the day…make it seem simple enough to identify our favorite whatever…but, it’s a bit more complicated than that.  As we grow up, we see in greater detail what appeals to us and what repels us.  Sometimes it takes experiencing something to know we don’t want “that” to happen again…which helps to better our position with the stick.  It greatly helps to see other people’s successes and failures to understand what we want with more clarity.  When we do arrive at that knowing place…we need to keep focused on the desirable half of the stick without reservation.  If we entertain the opposite side…the lack of what we want…that’s exactly what we will get.  You can’t have both ends of the stick work for you…it’s either what you are craving, wanting, and expecting…or it’s what you’re missing, wishing for, and miserable about.  Which ever side of the stick your emotions emanate from…that is what your experiences will draw from!!

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Tough Love, Gentle Love!!

January 20, 2010 · Leave a Comment

They think they know what they’re doing…and we, parents, know nothing about what their world is like.  This is partly true…because growing up 30 years ago was different from growing up now.  But, the premise of living a life of respect and responsibility is as old-fashioned as Noah’s Ark.  Maybe they are given too much, and required of too little, and have vices that keep them connected to friends more closely than family.  Maybe they have too many extracurricular activities for their own good, and not enough creative or productive time without a computer, cell phone, or tv.  Maybe they have had everything done for them at home…so they are not ready for doing life out on their own.  Whatever the package looks like, this challenging phase teenagers go through needs strong boundaries…and while they are screaming at us…they really are demanding roping in.  If we do, they may balk.  If we don’t, they will further ruin our family environment and sometimes the family structure.  They are figuring out their world…and what it will look like out from under our roof.  We need to step back and not make it personal…it’s their battle.  It’s not a reflection of our good parenting, our high hopes for them, or our previous good relationship with them.  Their wish for independence shows up in ugly ways at times and we need to allow them to fall a bit…face the consequences of their teen rebellion…and all the while, be re-affirming to the child that they will progress through this stage and out the other side…a better version of you.  And, the parent-child relationship will evolve into a different dynamic, as it should.  Letting go and letting them go…is so hard with no guilt trips, no attempt to make it comfortable, no going backwards.  In time, most kids come back to their roots…their upbringing…their family, with a greater appreciation for life, their family…and us as parents.  Tough love should be gentle…and is done by keeping the end result in mind of a healthy, respectful, and responsible adult…all the way through hell and back!!

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Speak to the Hand!!

January 19, 2010 · Leave a Comment

As we go about our day…on several occasions we’ll meet up with some things we don’t really like.  These can derail us from experiencing the kind of day we ultimately want… fun conversations, circumstances of well-being, and healthy thoughts.  There are some people who do not wish a good day for various reasons.  They may like to be sick so they don’t have to go to work, or to get attention…or they just seem to be comfortable having  issues.  Some people like to dwell on and contributing to dirty gossip because their life is mundane and other people’s issues make the day interesting.  Some just sabotage themselves by thinking negative thoughts that damage their self-image and choose failure before they even get into the starting block.   But, for those of us who want to make the most of the day…we can use a little tool to push-off  ambushes.  By lifting up our hand, we can literally stop the flow of something poisonous from getting too close.   We can learn to be aware of incoming missiles of destruction by just paying attention to what is drawing toward us.  Re-routing our thoughts and conversations to the “higher road” immediately pulls us out of the swamp and puts a hedge of protection around us.  Even as the “high” of hearing some juicy gossip is short lived…the better feeling comes by side-stepping that kind of behavior and find fulfillment in anything self-enhancing.  If we find ourself in a challenging season of life or getting caught up in someone else’s story…we need to keep focused on the way we want our life to be…and not get stuck in the current circumstance.  Wanting the best for ourself is the core of healthy thinking…and to get there, we have to protect ourself by saying, “Speak to the hand,” to the less than desirable things that come our way!!

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The Third String!!

January 18, 2010 · Leave a Comment

By the third period, the score had become quite lopsided, as it usually was in previous games.  With a big lead, the coach signaled for a time out and change was in the air.  The whistle blew a minute later and the crowd quieted as they watched the coach send the entire third string in to play.  The third string hardly saw the light of day on the court during a league game.  In fact, their game uniforms probably had never been washed before today.  They had resigned themselves to cheering on their teammates from the bench, instead of contributing on the court, so far this season.  And now…they were called up.  They took to the court like farm club athletes waiting for their big moment.  The boys ran like wild horses chased by cowboys with lasso’s.  They executed the plays with confidence and accuracy that for weeks had only been observed from the bench.  Sweat dripped down the sides of their faces as their intense focus drove the game to a new pitch.  A swell of cheers resonated from the bench that was now made up of the first and second string players.  As the boys threw up their shots, steadfastly rebounded, and drew fouls under the basket…a frenzy of comradery erupted while the bench screamed their support.  It seemed as though the fate of the world was resting on the outcome of this game.  The score, now even at 35-35, brought the crowd to their feet.  The clock ticked down, second after second…with only enough time for one more shot.  The point guard, a small and slight athlete, drove into the key, through the opposing guards, whose arms were all over him… and threw up a prayer.  The ball swirled around the rim twice, rolled out, slipping down the side of the net.  The whistle blew and the referee called a foul… ”one and one.”   Never before had this boy been to the free throw line.  His coach gave a thumbs up as he looked to the sideline for moral support.  Bent down low, bouncing the ball four times, he looked up at the hoop like he was looking into heaven.  All his team needed was one more point for the win.  With eyes wide open and biting his lower lip, he arched the ball toward the backboard.  It hit the back of the rim and ricocheted off.  “That’s okay,” the crowd cried…”You’ve got one more shot.  You can do it!”  The referee bounced the ball over to the player for his last attempt while the crowd held their breath.  Four more bounces, and with his lip tucked under his teeth, the boy shot it up again.  The most beautiful swishing sound was heard by everyone as the ball cleanly fit through the net…and the bench went wild at the final whistle.  The first and second strings rushed on to the court grabbing the third string players, jumping and hugging, and lifting each other up!  This sweet victory was a life changing moment… far beyond a basketball game… that would be remembered forever!!

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Weights and Balances!!

January 17, 2010 · Leave a Comment

What are the weights that measure the viewpoint and prove the actions in your life?  What have you given significance to that tips the scales on one end or the other?  The elements or factors, such as our religious belief, work ethic, self-confidence, comfort zone, persuasion, exposure, and education…all contribute weight to our own personal scale and show our true identity.  Each decision and action we make reveals our true identity…but, is always in an evolving mode.  We can change the factors, or weights, in our personal life scale by identifying what we want to exchange.  For example…if we have developed the habit of pointing out negative qualities in others, and have noticed how this behavior has begun to make us irritable to be around, we can make a change first by being cognizant of the damage it brings, and second, by keeping our negative comments to ourself.  This immediately changes the balance in the scale, and the new weight element is self-control which replaces the negative comment weight.    This is ultra-self awareness and self-healing.  It’s a powerful thing to be able to change an element in your own life…for you are the only one who has the ability to do it.  Consider the weights and measurements in the balance of your life…and see what you would like to exchange for something better!!

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Refreshingly Clean!!

January 16, 2010 · Leave a Comment

There is nothing so stunning as a stark contrast to help us get motivated and to drive our convictions deeper.  Showing houses to prospective buyers is always an interesting outing.  You never know what you’re going to see when you step into someone else’s way of doing life.  On a handful of occasions, there have been quite horrifying circumstances of filthy living conditions that we walked over and around while inspecting the house.  You always come away feeling so thankful for the beautiful place you get to go home to.  The cleanliness and healthy environment is managed with very simple things like brushing your pearly whites, wiping the refrigerator shelves, scrubbing the kitchen sink, hosing the porch and walkways, vacuuming dog hair off the floor, and washing the windows inside and out.  Tackle the bigger projects like the junk drawer or spare bedroom closet with the goal of emptying it…as if you were moving.  See how refreshingly clean you feel then!  Your environment is critical to your well-being and needs just a small amount of attention daily to create a healthy and refreshing retreat for you and your family!!

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What if You Knew??

January 15, 2010 · Leave a Comment

What if you knew what was coming down the pipe?  What if you were like a character in a fiction movie that knew the ending of events before they happened?  Having some unique sixth or seventh sense…a quazi-all-knowing awareness…might be more of a curse than a blessing.  Maybe it’s a good thing that we’re left to figure out our next step as we go.   Our energy should be directed to what is at hand…rather than wasting energy on what is to come.   A human being isn’t designed to worry…and miss today.   We’ll find that most of what kept us up at night doesn’t come to pass anyway.  Living where the rubber meets the road today…it’s where we’re suppose to be.  What a relief to not know what is around the corner!!

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Slow Motion Progress!!

January 14, 2010 · Leave a Comment

It’s always so interesting to watch action in slow motion.  You see details of the movement that you would miss if it were happening in real-time.  As you watch the tight petals of a flower peel back and show the vulnerable reproductive inside, the flower becomes much more complicated, beautiful, and intriguing.  You notice how varied the colors are and the shapes of each section fits together, balancing the flower on its stem.  Each petal arches it’s back to give a sill for the sun to kiss it…before it begins to draw in its edges when too tired to try.  Soon, the effort is too much for the flower to hold itself open, and the petals gently fall away, leaving the dry center standing alone.  The valuable seeds are resting in that not so beautiful center…waiting patiently for the wind to shake them loose and fall to the ground purposefully.  Only a few will find their way deep enough in the soil for protection and grow like the ones before them.  What would a slow motion clip show you…about yourself…if a camera followed you around for one day and night??

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Added After Purchase!!

January 13, 2010 · Leave a Comment

There are only so many things included when you first buy something like a car.  It might offer lots of bells and whistles…but, you’ll pay extra for them.  Then, if you want to get it totally dialed in…you send the car to a specialist to add the over-the-top features that regular dealership don’t offer.  Of course, it costs a big mound of cash to get the extra snazzy wheels, the custom paint job, the finest music system, and the specialty floor coverings.  And, the end result is a one of a kind…custom ride just as you dreamed it would be.  Fit your life on the frame of the car analogy…and you’ll see what you inherently were born with…what character traits you developed in early childhood, what qualities you chose to emphasize in your personality as an adult, and what skills you’ve gone out of your way to invest in which enhance the original model of you.  The greatest realization is that you’ve always possessed the ability to change your circumstance, your attitude, your place, and your life…according to whatever “additions” make you happy.  Now, what does the model of your life look like…and what do you want it to look like??

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Expansive Sky!!

January 12, 2010 · Leave a Comment

The horizon glowed like light infused honey comb with a tinge of pink.  The sunset’s warmth  lined the silvery gray strands of clouds with proud confidence.  Orchestrated together, the pale blue atmosphere faded into white as the edge of the earth resigned itself to the day’s end.  Marveling at the sky’s expanse, the beauty mesmerized you into a state of total bliss.  No care could derail you from admiring the heavenly spread before you.  A canopy of darkening blue  above promised the soon in coming cooler night.  Every so often this kind of natural splendor is given to us, and we’re lucky if we notice it.  Lingering images of the precious few moments of grandeur continued to infuse refreshment even as the evening curtain dropped.  Thankful for the soul-bath, the night came to steal away the sunlight and then it was gone.  Wishing for an encore…tomorrow night may find a few people with balcony views hoping to be serenaded by heavenly light show again!!

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Helping Friends!!

January 11, 2010 · Leave a Comment

For all of us… moments in life show up that we dread or fear.  It might involve family news of a tragedy or illness.  There may have been a job loss, relationship split, or disagreement with a best friend.  Our phone rings…and we find ourself on the receiving end of a desperate person needing us to be immediate support.  Their call could have come at an inconvenient time and you may not have enough patience at that moment…but, they need you right then…with no distractions.  They need  your critical first aid of comfort, as they vent every bloody detail while you put everything on hold for a few minutes and focus on them.  Occasionally, we find how quickly we’re able to rearrange our day to accomodate someone needing us in person.  Either on the phone or physically there…the greatest gift we can give when we get that call… is our time.  Someday, we may find we’re the one making the call to a friend when we’re falling apart…and how grateful we are for their gift of a listening ear or a helping hand!!

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A Virtual Vacation!!

January 10, 2010 · Leave a Comment

In just 2 seconds…you can be anywhere in the world. In just 5 minutes, you may be swaying in a hammock next to the Pacific Ocean, or cruising the Greek Isles, feeling the delicious breeze envelope your body. You might find youself slaloming down a slope in the Italian Alps or riding in a hot air balloon above the Napa Valley Vineyards. Your virtual vacation can take you to the Victoria Gardens, the French Open, or a Rocky Mountain cabin. An adventurer may be envisioning a white water rapid trip down the icy Colorado River, or scaling the sheer granite wall of El Capitan in Yosemite Valley, Wherever your adventure takes you…your virtual vacation may be the most refreshing 5 minutes of your day!!

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What’s the Deal??

January 9, 2010 · Leave a Comment

Animals are the funniest displays of  human traits when observed closely.  It’s hilarious to ascribe thoughts and words to their mannerisms, as if they were able to speak.  Apes of all varieties are the most amusing creatures…probably because physically they most closely resemble  humans .  They love bothering each other with silly provoking gestures…just to get a rise out of each other.  They comfort each other with pats and pick bugs off of each other and pile together in a big heap to stay close.  You’ll notice them gazing at each other in the eye as if acknowledging a conversation that only their body language is speaking.  One of the most interesting observations is that of  baby apes clutching their mother’s underside as she nonchalantly swings through the perilous tree tops in tandem with no fear of dropping the infant.   Cries and yells obviously communicated at the most basic level aren’t that much different than that of a human being threatened, injured, or just wound up and excited.  Coos and grunts may be more like our sighs and hmmms, all very necessary in communicating our satisfaction.  Whenever we find ourself wondering what the deal is with someone…we probably would do well to observe their antics…whether human or beast!!

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